I know these thoughts come and go, but is there a reason why these come and go? Is it necessary for me to ignore them? Is this how we supress feelings in life. I am still optimistic. I believe in you despite logic. Is it okay to love you without bounds but in my memory? Because I did. I lost logic and loved you. That didn’t go great. Should I come back to you? Is this teenage? Is this how teenage is supposed to be? Why do things happen to make us strong? Why do we become afraid? Why do we need to grow up? These questions make no sense. Some may say that the child in me is still there. The innocence, I wish I could embrace it openly. I really do. Why did I change my style of living because I thought the would care. Because nobody does. If we could just be born knowing this fact, life would be so much easier. And sometimes I get tired of always being so optimistic and in those times, I really need an outlet. God this teenage…I wish, how do we embrace these feelings openly? How do we things for our own best? How do we retain our individuality and why don’t we? I think the only way is to love openly. If we love someone without bounds, we are braver than we could imagine. I mean really. We are optimistic human beings. Don’t lose the optimism guys, don’t get lost in reality, let reality get lost in your innocence. Ohhhh the things we do in peer pressure. How impressionable we teenagers are. I wonder if adults are that stupid. Oh of course, they are the evolution and hence, stupider. Retain yourself in this world that washes you away.  So this leads us to deduce that we can retain our innocence and keep our dreams in and stay in this world. We can find a way to be ourselves, go through all the tough shit and yet stay alive in this world and be happy. So people who don’t evolve into stupid adults are geniuses~People who die with the same childlike innocence with which they were born are geniuses.

~So the thought behind this was, that maybe we just try to retain what we have left of ourselves. Maybe we are holding on to ourselves too hard, and maybe, we do get to decide who we become. We don’t need to get affected by the world, we can choose a different path. Maybe sometimes, the world doesn’t really understand certain things the way they are and you can’t really make them understand what it means to you. So sometimes maybe we just don’t need the world’s validation, maybe we just need to trust ourselves and be enough for us and do whatever we want to, whatever it means to the world. That’s how innovation comes, I guess. That’s how individuality is, I guess. 

As for fighting change, in ourselves and others, that’s normal. I mean we are human beings, we second guess nearly every decision we make. And the fact that we are resisting change is a sign of awareness of the change, which is very good. And very healthy, maybe a little too much. I think we just need to go through this phase knowing that we’ll be better human beings at the end of the day.

~with love,

Tejasvi